Terça-feira, 14 de Abril de 2020

Feeling Trapped in Life? 13 Ways to Get Unstuck

 

Feeling Trapped in Life? 

13 Ways to Get Unstuck

Sherrie Hurd, A.A.

learning-mind.com

Posted April 13th, 2020.

 
 
 

 

It’s not always easy shaking the mindset of feeling trapped. You must learn how to free yourself from the stuck places in life and in your mind.

What Is Feeling Trapped in Life Like?

Have you ever felt stuck? It’s a strange feeling that comes when life seems to repeat itself over and over. If you’ve ever seen the movie Groundhog Day, you understand what feeling stuck is like, and how intolerable repeating the same things can be. And it’s not just about being stuck in life, actually.
It’s better represented by the terms, “feeling trapped” because, honestly, people feel trapped like they’re living in a cage of existence. They are going through the motions like a mechanical being.
You might not initially notice when you’re feeling the trapped sensations. At first, you may think that you’re just afraid of change. And really, that is a part of it – fear makes us afraid of change, and thus, fear keeps us trapped. But we must learn how to connect these emotions in order to free ourselves from them.
You can stop this feeling of being stuck by practicing something different. It sounds like I want you to embrace change, doesn’t it? Well, maybe I do. In the meantime, read on.

How to Get Unstuck in Life?

1. Stop living in the past

I think this is the hardest thing for me to do. I sometimes sit around and think about times when my children were small, when my parents were alive, and when I was back in grade school. While I have many bad memories, I also have many good ones as well.
The truth is the good memories tend to keep me stuck even more than the bad ones. I catch myself wishing I could go back to what I think was a simpler time. The thoughts and emotions are deep, but they are keeping me stuck. Practicing the art of not dwelling on the past is the best thing to do in this case, and I am working on that as I go along. Hey, liberation doesn’t always feel good at first.

2. Learn something new

Last summer, I learned, hands-on, how to properly change a tire. Someone told me how to do it, but I never had the opportunity to complete the entire process on my own. Yeah, I guess some of you are laughing at me, but it’s true. I learned how to do something new, and with that, I felt a wonderful sense of pride in my accomplishments.
After that, I wanted to learn how to do even more things. I then took a lawnmower carburetor apart, cleaned the parts and put it back together with the help of YouTube. These things definitely helped me feel a bit liberated for the remainder of the summer months. So, go try something new and get unstuck. Just be careful when you do.

3. Change your scenery

Change your scenery when feeling trapped in life
 
Okay, so right now you might not be able to go on many trips or vacations, but later on, you will. If you get the chance to afford it, take a trip somewhere when all this turmoil is over. Until then, get out of one room of your home, the one which you frequent the most often, and try hanging out somewhere else in your home. It will feel as though you’ve taken a trip without going anywhere.
Do all your work, past times, reading, and napping in this different location. Just change your surroundings for a bit so you will not go crazy feeling trapped.

4. Change your exercise routine

Are you used to going on walks or jogging? Are you accustomed to doing aerobic exercises in your living room? Well, why not change up your fitness routine for a while and make it interesting. If you have a bike, and a good trail nearby, maybe now is the time to take a short bike ride to get your blood pumping. If winter and storms have ravaged your yard, then maybe a bit of yard work will reward you the exercise you need.
There are many ways to stay fit and keep you from getting bored by doing so. When we get bored with the things we do, we surely start feeling trapped again. When we keep moving, we understand that we are already free.

5. Finish some incomplete goals

Do you remember those scrapbooks you wanted to finish? Do you remember the book you never finished writing? What about completing that table you started building several months ago?
If you’re staying at home and feeling trapped, there are probably many things you haven’t completed from the past. Find those procrastinated projects and finish them now. When finishing those tasks, you will feel extraordinary freedom like never before.

6. The vision board

Some people aren’t familiar with the vision board. Well, it’s something I learned about when I was in sales. A vision board is exactly what its name says – it’s a board with images. But more than that, it’s a collage of pictures representing all the things you want out of life. It’s the dreams, goals, and aspirations that you have yet to reach.
All it takes is finding the right size bulletin-type board and cutting out pictures from magazines and such which remind you of your dreams in life. Now, don’t let these pictures depress you. No, let them inspire you to work toward what you want. Hang the board somewhere you see often so you can remember your priorities.

7. Try waking up earlier

You might not be a morning person, but maybe you should give this a try anyway. If you’re at home working right now, you are probably sleeping in a bit more than usual. That might not be the best thing for you. Even if you are going to work, then maybe you should get up a bit earlier than usual as well.
Waking up earlier gives you a few extra hours in your day, warding off the regret of getting up too late and starting slow. In a way, it’s psychological. The earlier you wake, it feels as if you have a better chance of a good day, feeling liberated and definitely not feeling trapped.

8. Business on the side

If you have the time and you have a few unused skills, then you should consider a small business venture on the side.
Let me off an example: I grow cucumbers every summer, and I make at least 30-40 jars of pickles from these. I make them for myself, but just this past summer, a few people tasted them and wanted to buy a jar, and so I sold a few of them. I was surprised when they wanted to buy more later on. Thus, I have been tempted to open up to make a side hustle out of this experience. I also make jams and relish, so I could even add a bit of variety to this side job.
This can be done in many areas of expertise. If you find that you’re good at something which can be monetized, then maybe this is what you need to get untrapped. The feeling you get when someone appreciates your work, or your creativity is a liberating feeling.
You can sell commissioned artwork, baked goods, or you can even sell your time by offering housekeeping services. I also did this for a while a few years ago. I’m telling you, it does break the monotony.

9. Make small changes

The incentives you use to become untrapped are changes, and change is so hard sometimes. The good news is that your changes don’t have to be huge. In fact, it’s best if you make small changes at first in order to get used to your new mindset.
For instance, you can start by changing your daily routine just a bit. Instead of waking up and immediately checking the news, you can go for a walk to help wake you up for the day. Then you can return to your coffee or tea, your news updates, and then to a healthy breakfast. Just this small change will invigorate you and help liberate you from feeling trapped in life.

10. Adjust your playlist

 
music for anxiety
Speaking of changes, one thing you can do is redo your playlist. Maybe you have a nice arrangement of diverse music on your phone, iPod, or other listening devices, and these songs have worked great for you and your motivation in the past.
If you’re feeling stuck, however, it may be time to change some of your musical selections, mix it up and bit, and even consider listening to songs you wouldn’t have before. Changing your playlist and then listening to the product of your changes tends to send a jolt of renewed energy throughout your senses. I’ve done this and it really works.

11. Try keeping a planner

Okay, so I will be honest with you about this one, I have used a planner many times to help me remember things, and also to keep me motivated, thus escaping my prison of disappointments. It works as long as you keep doing it. My problem was always slacking off with jotting down appointments and plans, and then at times, simply forgetting what the planner that I was using to remember things… if that makes sense.
But, the only way to keep using your planner is to constantly pick one back up and try again. It is hard sometimes to remember your planner, your journal, or whatever works for jotting down important things or your goals, but it still works when you do it.
So, let’s try this again, and keep another planner to organize your life. After all, your daily organization does not enslave you, it actually frees you from a lot of worry and frustration.

12. Change your appearance

Depending on where you can go or what you can do, you can choose to change your appearance in some way. Even if you can’t leave home, you can give yourself a haircut… well, maybe. I guess this depends on whether you have the slightest clue of how to do this. If not, maybe a family member does and will offer to help you with that.
You can dye your hair if you have the materials you need. If you can’t do either one, you can style your hair differently, wear clothes you usually don’t wear, or you can try a new make-up style.
However, you manage to do this, it will help you feel a little less trapped in life. At least you will see your freedom to control how you want to look, and that’s important. Actually having control over your appearance is an underrated ability. Try it.

13. Find the reason

When you’re feeling stuck in life, there is always a reason. The unfortunate part about that is you don’t always recognize the root of the problem. Before you can improve your life in any other way, you need to find out what has you so trapped. It could be a person or a place, but either way, this is the key to understanding which way you should go.
Feeling Trapped? Then Do Something about It!
status quo bias feeling trapped
That’s right! I just told you to get up and get yourself going. Change some habits, eat better and go outside too. There are so many ways to break the monotony of feeling like you’re trapped in life. Many days, it might even be hard to get out of bed, so motivation is key.
And another thing, never neglect your gifts and talents. These often help you change your life faster than just making simple decisions on trivial things. You can be aggressive at times when seeking change and liberation.
One thing is for sure, feeling trapped is just fear, and getting free is about faith in the little changes and improvements in your life. Try something that you didn’t do yesterday. This is how you get started on feeling free in life. It also means stepping out on bravery you never knew you had. Your courage is there, you just have to recognize how it feels.
Thank you for reading, guys!

 

Sherrie Hurd

 

 

Copyright © 2012-2020 Learning Mind. All rights reserved. For permission to reprint, contact us. 

 

 

 



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No religious or political creed is advocated here.

Organised religion is unnecessary to spirituality.

Excellent teachings of the masters have been contaminated by the dogmatic control of these religions.

Discernment yes; judgement does not.
If you use discernment you are free to research with an open mind. 

With discernment it is possible to reach the spirit of the letter of any writing and it is also much easier to listen to the voice of the soul that comes from the heart.
Individually you can be helped to find your Truth that is different of everyone. 


Please respect all credits.

 
Discernment is recommended.
 

All articles are of the respective authors and/or publishers responsibility. 


 

 

Like this! please bookmark. It is updated daily

 


 
 
 
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publicado por achama às 23:36
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How to Deal with Loneliness and Isolation During Quarantine

 

How to Deal with Loneliness and Isolation During Quarantine

Sherrie Hurd, A.A.

learning-mind.com

Posted April 13th, 2020.

 
 
 

 

Being alone and being lonely are two different things. Learn how to deal with loneliness during this trying time.
There’s nothing wrong with living alone. However, when quarantine happens, being alone may not be as comfortable as it once was. Even when we’re our only company at home, we can usually go out at times, but with a threat to our mortality at hand, this changes things. We must adjust to this change in our lifestyle.
Loneliness vs Being Alone
I’ve been alone before. When I first divorced several years ago, I had every other week on my own. The thing is, I still had to go to work and shop for food. I even spent time with a few close friends. I’m not alone now, but I can’t imagine how hard it would be for someone that is alone during this crisis, especially the more outgoing people.
Being alone is okay, but being lonely can take a toll on your health. So, it’s good to have ways to fight off this loneliness many of us are going through now.

How to deal with loneliness?

Dealing with loneliness isn’t easy for some people. After all, the norm is to go out and have fun when you’re lonely, right? Well, right now, we can’t run around and congregate in large numbers, we can’t dine out in nice restaurants, and we cannot even enjoy large spiritual gatherings. At least, we’re not supposed to do this.

1. Digital socializing

Most of the time, I would tell you to get off your computer and go visit someone, but today, I won’t be saying that. Today, I will be telling you to spend more time on your computer and chit chat with some friends. I’m serious. Now is the time to socialize online and share your feelings with others.
While we are quarantined, we can share our loneliness and thus thin it out a bit. Now, I didn’t say spend every waking moment on social media and such. That would make us more dependent now and later on as well. I just think you should check in every day with a  friend or two and release a bit of that pent up tension.

2. Understand what you’re feeling

It’s important to understand the differences in alone, loneliness and solitude. If you can easily differentiate between these three, you will be better capable of dealing with the inability to go out or see others. Alone is a choice, loneliness is the feeling of disconnect, and solitude is being alone in your thoughts completely, which includes being alone and disconnected as well.
You can actually be lonely in a room full of people. Did you know that? So, loneliness can be combatted by actually leaving a room and choosing to be by yourself for a while. That seems strange, doesn’t it, when learning how to deal with the effects of loneliness? And that is why it’s important that you know these differences.

3. Be old-fashioned / use the phone

I remember when the only way to get in touch with friends was the telephone. We still have that option with smartphones. Maybe, instead of hopping on the computer, we can give someone a call. Spend time the old-fashion way, and talk about how you’re feeling with friends and even distant family.
Learn about what’s happening in their area. It works in pretty much the same way as social media and such, but it gives your eyes a rest. Keep in mind, too much screen time can give you headaches, and you don’t want to be lonely with a headache. Switch your contact abilities up a bit.

4. Get to know and appreciate yourself

Did you know that some loneliness stems from the fact that you don’t know who you are, or that you don’t like yourself? This is also a fact.
Not until I spent some time alone during rotating weeks of joint child custody, did I learn who I really was, and guess what? I am a good person and worthy of all my dreams and goals. Many people lean on others to decide who they are and base their worth, and they should never do that.
Now’s the time to get to know yourself, and if you don’t like what you learn, then dig deeper and do some repair work. Just don’t let despair and depression try and tell you who you are. Remember this: you are beautiful, you are worthy, and you are needed in this broken world. Over time, this self-education will relieve quite a bit of your loneliness and you will love your own company.

5. Stay active

I know this is an option on many of my posts concerning a myriad of conditions and situations, but it works. In fact, I am such a fan of this option that I downloaded a free app for daily short exercises and Yoga sessions. At the moment, there are several free apps for your phone that guide you through workouts, and you should check it out.
As well as inside exercises, if you live in a remote location with distant neighbors, you can get some exercise outside. Take a walk, jog or if it’s warm in your area, plant a few herbs or vegetables. It actually takes quite a bit of energy to cultivate and plant a garden, even potted plants. Either way, find a way to stay active. This is how you understand how to deal with loneliness.

Loneliness during isolation and quarantine

These are only a few ways to deal with being quarantined, and it works with isolation as well. Considering, to be honest, isolation is used to keep the sick from infecting others, and quarantine is keeping you separated from the sick in most cases.
These terms are sometimes used interchangeably or incorrectly, but you probably understand my point. Knowing this, you must find ways to keep yourself occupied, maybe even for quite some time.
You can also read, paint, listen to music, and reorganize your home. There are so many ideas, but it may be hard to think of these things because of the intensive loneliness, and the depression it may bring. I hope this helps a little, and you can offer other ideas in the comments as well.
We will get through this, so hang in there.

 

 

Sherrie Hurd

 

 

Copyright © 2012-2020 Learning Mind. All rights reserved. For permission to reprint, contact us. 

 

 

 



Compiled by http://violetflame.biz.ly from: 
 
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No religious or political creed is advocated here.

Organised religion is unnecessary to spirituality.

Excellent teachings of the masters have been contaminated by the dogmatic control of these religions.

Discernment yes; judgement does not.
If you use discernment you are free to research with an open mind. 

With discernment it is possible to reach the spirit of the letter of any writing and it is also much easier to listen to the voice of the soul that comes from the heart.
Individually you can be helped to find your Truth that is different of everyone. 


Please respect all credits.

 
Discernment is recommended.
 

All articles are of the respective authors and/or publishers responsibility. 


 

 

Like this! please bookmark. It is updated daily

 


 
 
 
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publicado por achama às 01:13
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Quinta-feira, 9 de Abril de 2020

Why You Are Feeling Sorry for Yourself and How to Stop

 

Why You Are Feeling Sorry for Yourself and How to Stop

Sherrie Hurd, A.A.

learning-mind.com

Posted April 8th, 2020.

 
 
 

 

You’ve probably moped around feeling sorry for yourself before. There are ways to stop this and cultivate a more positive attitude.
Yes, I am familiar with self-pity, and I bet you are too. But feeling sorry for yourself doesn’t get you far in life. It robs you of the time you can use to be productive and change things. No, the world isn’t fair, and bad things happen sometimes, but mulling around in self-negativity doesn’t help.
Are you feeling sorry for yourself?
Quick, take your mental temperature. Are you wallowing in self-pity? There are ways to tell if you are. If you’ve lost all passion for the things you love or talk constantly about your misfortune, you might be feeling sorry for your life and yourself. Would you like to know how to stop doing this? I thought you would.

How to stop the train of pity?

1. Accept the pity

I know this might sound counteractive, but just listen. It is okay to feel sorry for yourself for a little while. I know I might be going a little against the title in this post, but you will understand if you read on. What’s most concerning, is staying in self-pity for too long.
So, allow yourself to feel those negative feelings, every single emotion, but then agree to let them go after a certain period of time. Just don’t hold onto negativity for too long. Letting self-pity go will help you eventually feel less and less sorry for yourself in time.

2. Help someone

Helping other people always gets us out of our own head and into the concerns of friends, family, and even some strangers. The more you get out of your head, the better the perspective on what’s happening in your life that hurts. Of course, you should tackle your problems after helping someone else. Keep those things separated.
For example: Help someone move, listen to someone else’s problems or offer to babysit. Trust me, all these things will make you stop thinking negatively about yourself so much. You will see what other people are going through. Plus, it’s just right to help others anyway.

3. Change your focus

No matter what’s happened in your life to make you feel sorry for yourself, there are many things good about you. There are things that people see in you that you may not even see in yourself. However, if you focus on things that don’t revolve around self-pity, you may be able to grow a more positive outlook.
Try focusing on what you have instead of what you don’t have. So, you might not own a house, but you rent a decent one that keeps you safe and warm. You might not have a new car, but the one you have gets you where you need to go. Change how you see things, and self-pity will fade.

4. Stop giving up, and start breaking boundaries

When I say boundaries, I don’t mean the positive ones you’ve set for you and your life. I’m talking about the limitations that people place on you in society.
If you’re trying to become a doctor, and people keep telling you that you’re not cut out for it, do you back down and accept what they say? Of course, you don’t because this makes you start feeling sorry for yourself. So, if you want to be a doctor, start climbing on the bumps of criticism that everyone keeps throwing in front of you. When you refuse to give up, pity cannot survive.

5. Stay away from the 3 P’s

There are three thought processes that keep us locked in feeling pity. These mindsets are personalization, pervasiveness, and permanence.
With personalization, we tend to think that our situation is our fault alone. We blame ourselves and dwell on what we could have done differently. With pervasiveness, we assume that a traumatic event will affect all areas of our lives, and this is not true. And permanence makes us think that bad things will last forever.
These three lies must be thrown out in order to stop feeling sorry about our situations.

6. Think about your future

Yes, it’s great to live in the present, I encourage that. The thing is, you need to take a quick look at how your future could be if you continue to feel sorry for yourself. You see, self-pity is stressful, and it can take years off your life.
So, ask yourself if what you’re feeling bad about will matter in the next 5 years. If you don’t think it will, then start to let it go before it makes you sick. Remember, mental and physical health are connected and influence each other both ways. Keep your future in sight, just a bit of it, and maybe this will help you retain hope instead of pity.

So, let’s stop feeling sorry for us

When I say us, it means I sometimes suffer from the trap of self-pity myself. So, you’re not alone. It’s not all that difficult to do, especially when your life has been a series of letdowns and traumatic events. But you see, you cannot let those things define you, and when you feel sorry for yourself, that’s what happens.
I hope this helped you do a bit of positive thinking, and most of all, I hope it gave you the strength to stand in the face of adversity. I’m working on it myself, and so we’re doing it together.
I wish you well.
References:
  1. https://www.forbes.com
  2. https://www.ncbi.nlm.nih.gov

 

 

 
Sherrie Hurd

 

 

Copyright © 2012-2020 Learning Mind. All rights reserved. For permission to reprint, contact us. 

 

 

 



Compiled by http://violetflame.biz.ly from: 
 
Archives:
 

 
 

A Trusty with Privacy Search 
Alternative to Google
startpage.com

Alternative to YouTube
bitchete.com
brighteon.com
 
 



No religious or political creed is advocated here.

Organised religion is unnecessary to spirituality.

Excellent teachings of the masters have been contaminated by the dogmatic control of these religions.

Discernment yes; judgement does not.
If you use discernment you are free to research with an open mind. 

With discernment it is possible to reach the spirit of the letter of any writing and it is also much easier to listen to the voice of the soul that comes from the heart.
Individually you can be helped to find your Truth that is different of everyone. 


Please respect all credits.

 
Discernment is recommended.
 

All articles are of the respective authors and/or publishers responsibility. 


 

 

Like this! please bookmark. It is updated daily

 


 
 
 
Free counters!

  geoglobe1
 
 
publicado por achama às 01:56
link | comentar | favorito
Terça-feira, 7 de Abril de 2020

5 Lessons Coronavirus Lockdown Teaches Us about Life

5 Lessons Coronavirus Lockdown Teaches Us about Life

By Anna LeMind, M.A.

April 6th, 2020

coronavirus lockdown life lessons.

 

 

With current coronavirus lockdown in many countries of the world, the regular flow of life has stopped. Basically, our lives have been put on hold.
We are asked to stay at home and to reduce our social and outdoor activities to the very minimum. Sounds like an introvert’s definition of paradise, doesn’t it? Yes, in these uneasy times, the quiet ones finally have an advantage in society.
However, for everyone else, it’s an incredibly challenging situation. An outgoing person who craves social contact and whose normal life is full of gatherings and activities can’t just turn into an introverted loner out of the blue.
Still, the coronavirus quarantine and lockdown can give us many valuable lessons about life. Everyone can learn from this difficult situation, both introverts and extroverts.

5 Life Lessons to Learn from the Coronavirus Lockdown

1. Don’t put your life on hold

This one may sound controversial at first. After all, everyone’s life is on hold right now. But here, I’m talking about our lives before the coronavirus pandemic (and hopefully, after it).
We all have something we dream about but don’t have the courage to fulfill it. We all have plans in life but are waiting for better times to turn them into a reality.
Maybe you wanted to change your career path or have a baby. Maybe you dreamed about traveling the world or enrolling in art classes. Right now, you can’t do any of these things because of the quarantine. You have to wait. And who knows for how long.
When we constantly postpone our plans and dreams, there comes a time when we no longer can (or want) to bring them to fruition. So don’t neglect your dreams and don’t put your life plans and goals on hold, waiting for the right moment. This moment may never come.

2. Live in the moment and find happiness in simple things

Here you are, stuck in your home, bored and lonely. But even in isolation, it’s possible to find ways to have fun and things to be grateful for. Use this situation as an opportunity to spend quality time with your family and kids. Plan a stay-at-home date with your special someone. Call your parents. Read books or find an online course you long wanted to take.
This list can be endless. The point is that even in times of quarantine and social distancing, you can enjoy yourself and live in the present moment. The joys of everyday life like a video call with your best friend or a walk with your dog have the power to make you happy.
With the coronavirus lockdown, we all have the opportunity to see that happiness is in simple, everyday things. And most importantly, it is in immaterial things. Expensive jewelry and brand clothes are out of use right now. But simple pleasures like a good read or a warm conversation are worth their weight in gold.

3. Taking breaks is necessary

hectic, anxiety-fueling lifestyle has become normal in our world. Before the pandemic, we couldn’t even imagine our days without busy schedules and tons of unnecessary stress. And yet, here they are. The whole world is taking a break from this rat race.
No matter how difficult the overall pandemic situation can feel, we could actually benefit from this break. Take a few moments to appreciate that. Enjoy the abundant sleep you lacked before. Relax at home, take a hot bath, just let yourself be lazy.
We all know that anxiety and stress are bad for our physical and mental health. But being busy all the time can also distract us from fulfilling our life purpose. When our minds are constantly occupied with job worries and mundane problems, we lose touch with our inner selves.
For this reason, taking a break can help us hear the voice of our souls. Use the lockdown time to get to know yourself better and discover what makes you truly happy and brings meaning to your life.

4. Appreciate nature

Here, I’m talking about appreciating nature on both personal and societal levels. Those of us living in the cities rarely have the opportunity to escape the world of concrete and asphalt and get closer to nature.
I bet that right now, many people think about those walks in the park they didn’t take and those trips to the countryside they didn’t go on. Even introverts who don’t go out that often are likely to have this kind of regrets. I do. Even when you are not a fan of going outside, it’s great to have an option to.
Then, the coronavirus pandemic and lockdown show us what we’ve been doing to our planet all this time. Now that most people stay at home and tourism is dead, nature is taking back. Scientists report reduced levels of pollution in Italy. Even the waters in Venice canals have cleared up as there are no tourists in the city and the locals are staying at home!
The sad truth is that we have become parasites to our home planet. Maybe it’s time we start to treat it with more respect and appreciation.

5. Always be ready for the tough times

We have talked about living in the moment and following your dreams. But we should never forget that tough times are a part of life and we need to be ready. Right now, many people have found themselves unprepared in a both financial and practical sense. And they have nowhere to get help from.
Situations like the coronavirus lockdown teach us that we need to stay optimistic but be ready for the worst. Always have a financial safety cushion and health insurance. You never know what can happen tomorrow.
You may say that this is quite a pessimistic approach. It is not. It’s just a realistic one. I’ve got an acquaintance who, no matter how severe your problem is, always tells you one single thing: think positive. Lost your job? Think positive. Have an acute conflict with your in-laws? Think positive. Coronavirus threat? Think positive.
While positivity has plenty of benefits, this kind of advice is valid only to a certain extent. If you get seriously ill or run out of food, no amount of positive thought can help you. Oftentimes, you need to take real actions in order to solve a problem.
Positive thinking is good, but blind positivity is not. Cultivate an optimistic attitude, but be prepared for possible adversities that may show up at your door.Turn the coronavirus lockdown into an opportunity for personal growth
The coronavirus pandemic is a tough situation for everyone. But this too shall pass. Meanwhile, use this period of self-isolation as an opportunity to learn and grow as a person. After all, it’s during difficult times that we discover our inner strength and perseverance.
Stay strong and be well.
 

Anna LeMind
 

 

 

 

 

 

 

About the Author: Anna LeMind

Anna is the founder and lead editor of the website Learning-mind.com. She is passionate about learning new things and reflecting on thought-provoking ideas. She writes about science, psychology and other related topics. She is particularly interested in topics regarding introversion, consciousness and subconscious, perception, human mind's potential, as well as the nature of reality and the universe.
 

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No religious or political creed is advocated here.

Organised religion is unnecessary to spirituality.

Excellent teachings of the masters have been contaminated by the dogmatic control of these religions.

Discernment yes; judgement does not.
If you use discernment you are free to research with an open mind. 

With discernment it is possible to reach the spirit of the letter of any writing and it is also much easier to listen to the voice of the soul that comes from the heart.
Individually you can be helped to find your Truth that is different of everyone. 


Please respect all credits.
 
 
Discernment is recommended.
 
 
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publicado por achama às 01:17
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Quinta-feira, 2 de Abril de 2020

Hindsight Bias: Why We Overestimate Our Ability to Predict Events.

Hindsight Bias: 

Why We Overestimate Our Ability to Predict Events.

Janey Davies, B.A.

https://www.learning-mind.com

April 1st, 2020.

 
 

 
They say hindsight is a wonderful thing, but don’t you just hate it when people say things like ‘I told you that would happen’ or ‘I just knew it all along’? Are they particularly gifted in their ability to see into the future or predict the past? I’m afraid not. They are more likely to suffer from something called hindsight bias.

What Is Hindsight Bias?

Simply put, it is a psychological phenomenon that explains why people overestimate their ability to predict an outcome they had no chance of predicting.
In hindsight bias, we either revise the probabilities after the event, or we exaggerate the extent to which an event could have been predicted.
In other words, people overestimate how predictable an event is and subsequently believe they predicted it before it happened. When an event or experience is occurring we can guess to the possible outcomes. However, there’s no way we can possibly predict what is going to happen.
We might get a gut feeling or hope for a particular result, but there’s no way of really knowing.

Examples of a Hindsight Bias

  • Your football wins the World Cup trophy and you knew all along they would win.
  • The political party you voted for in the last election loses drastically and you were convinced they would lose.
  • Your favourite soap actor gets killed off in a recent episode and you remember thinking it would happen.
  • The weather forecast has a 10% chance of rain, but it does. You told everyone it was going to rain.

But Why Do We Fall into This Cognitive Trap?

Research in 2012 from psychological scientists Roese and Vohs from the University of Minnesota suggests there are three cognitive factors that contribute to hindsight bias.
  1. Memory Distortion

‘I said that would happen.’
We distort or misremember the event and our predictions at that particular time. When we look back we think we knew the outcome all along.
  1. Inevitability

‘It had to happen.’
We believe the event was inevitable and that it would happen. When assessing something that has occurred, we assume it was bound to happen.
  1. Foreseeability

‘I knew it would happen.’
We assume that we could have foreseen the outcome of the event.
It is when the above three factors occur together that you are likely to see the hindsight bias.
The Cognitive Processing That Leads to Hindsight Bias
So what is actually going on in our minds when we fall for the hindsight bias? Let’s examine each one of the three cognitive factors:

Memory

When we look back at an event, our minds subconsciously cherry-pick the information we know to be true. We then create a whole new narrative that is different from the actual event, thus allowing us to remember it the way we want to.

Inevitability

Now we have processed the event with our cherry-picked bits of information we have our story that backs up our prediction. Now the narrative is simple to understand it is much easier for us to see the outcome.

Foreseeability

So we have doctored our memories to make sense of the event. This allows us closure. Once again, we have made sense of the chaos of ordinary life. Balance is restored and the world is ordered again.
As a result, ultimately, hindsight bias makes us feel good about ourselves and the world around us. We feel safe in our own knowledge. Our judgement was right. We predicted what was going to happen and it did happen.
The world is back to normal again. But there are problems with this cognitive bias.
“If you feel like you knew it all along, it means you won’t stop to examine why something really happened,” says Roese. “It’s often hard to convince seasoned decision-makers that they might fall prey to hindsight bias.”
Hindsight bias can also fool us into thinking we know more than we do. We can become over-confident in our own abilities and judgments on the world.
When we think ‘we knew it all along’, we don’t stop to ask pertinent questions. It can stop us from examining additional evidence. We’ve already predicted the outcome. Why do we need further investigation?
The problem with hindsight bias is that it can lead to poor decision-making, over-reliance on past results and simplifying outcomes.
As with all biases, these are the mental shortcuts we take every day to make sense of the world. But these shortcuts in our thinking can have dire consequences. Including, as Vohl’s states:
“A myopic attention to a single causal understanding of the past (to the neglect of other reasonable explanations) as well as general overconfidence in the certainty of one’s judgements”.

When Is Hindsight Bias Dangerous?

People can follow the same path as before because they believe they already know the outcome. For example, in the business world, it can be difficult to know what exactly makes a successful enterprise. Investors will fund similar markets because they made money before.
CEOs will back a certain product because its predecessor did well and made a profit. In addition, judges in the courtroom can come up against the same defendant and assume they will follow a particular criminal path as before.
In all of the above examples, no one is examining the situation before them at that present moment. They are basing their decision on past events. The trouble with doing this is that they are misremembering what happened. So the information they are using to make future decisions is tarnished.

How to Avoid Hindsight Bias

There are ways you can avoid this type of bias.
Start from scratch – When you come up against a situation you have encountered before, analyse from the beginning. Don’t use past events to influence you.
Get constant feedback – Studies show that those who receive continual feedback on their work are less likely to fall for hindsight bias.
Use all the information you have – This is known as Bayesian Thinking after the 18-century English statistician Thomas Bayes. His idea was that all information is relevant, but some information has more value. Your job is to weigh up what is important and what is not.
You do not have a crystal ball – Make decisions on the actual data in front of you. Not what you think might happen. Whatever the evidence says pay attention to it. Not your gut feelings.

Final thoughts

We all like to think we are special and have amazing talents. The truth is we are just ordinary people trying to make sense of the world.
 
References:
  1. www.investopedia.com
  2. www.verywellmind.com


Janey Davies



About the Author: Janey Davies.
Janey Davies has been published online for over 8 years. She is the head writer for Shoppersbase.com, she also writes for AvecAgnes.co.uk, Ewawigs.com and has contributed to inside3DP.com. She has an Honours Degree in Psychology and her passions include learning about the mind, popular science and politics. When she is relaxing she likes to walk her dog, read science fiction and listen to Muse.
 
 
COPYRIGHT © 2019 LEARNING MIND. ALL RIGHTS RESERVED. FOR PERMISSION TO REPRINT, CONTACT US.
 
 
 



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No religious or political creed is advocated here.

Organised religion is unnecessary to spirituality.

Excellent teachings of the masters have been contaminated by the dogmatic control of these religions.

Discernment yes; judgement does not.
If you use discernment you are free to research with an open mind. 

With discernment it is possible to reach the spirit of the letter of any writing and it is also much easier to listen to the voice of the soul that comes from the heart.
Individually you can be helped to find your Truth that is different of everyone. 


Please respect all credits.

 
Discernment is recommended.
 

All articles are of the respective authors and/or publishers responsibility. 




 

Like this! please bookmark. It is updated daily

 


 
 
 
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publicado por achama às 02:49
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Sexta-feira, 21 de Fevereiro de 2020

6 Signs You Are Self-Sabotaging and How to Stop This Toxic Behavior.

6 Signs You Are Self-Sabotaging and How to Stop This Toxic Behavior.

Sherrie Hurd.

learning-mind.com

Posted February 20th, 2020.

 
 



 
 
Unfortunately, we can sometimes fall into self-sabotaging behavior. There is more than one reason for that.
 
At the moment, I feel as if I am sabotaging my life. Just when I think everything is okay, another boulder rolls down the hill and flattens me again. But it’s not a real boulder, it just feels like one. You see, at that moment, I lose all desire for the things that used to make me happy. It’s like I’m waiting for the rocks to stop falling. It’s a possibility that will never happen in my present situation. So, I feel stuck, and thus, I am sabotaging my life in the process.
 
Toxic aspects of self-sabotaging behavior
 
Procrastination is part of my behavior. I will sit and binge watch television for hours so I don’t have to face the unfairness and disrespect in my life. Instead, I try to ignore it by losing myself in some fake story on the TV. And there are many other things I do, and others do that prove we are sabotaging our lives – we are wasting precious time by letting what others do govern the next move or the next goal. There are many signs that this is true.
 
Indicators that you are sabotaging your life
 
1. You’re choosing comfort over change
 
Maybe it was once a good situation, the life you’re living right now, but things have been revealed, and it’s no longer the life you thought. In fact, it’s almost unbearable. However, it must not be bad enough for you to change it. I heard this saying once, and don’t remember where, but it fits this perfectly.
 
Once there was a dog that was sitting on a long sharp nail. A man asked the dog’s owner why the dog didn’t get up off the nail. He said it must be painful for him. The owner said, “when it hurts bad enough, he will move”.
 
That’s what happens to us. Sometimes we refuse to change because we’re not hurting bad enough yet. Eventually, if things don’t get better, the pain will become too much to take. That’s when we may give up the self-sabotaging behavior and get off that nail that’s driving deep within. That’s when we may make a better life for ourselves.
 
2. Blame is never allocated correctly
 
When something happens, you tend to either blame yourself when it isn’t your fault and blame others when it is your fault. This might not be the case 100% of the time, but it’s most of the time. Your focus is on “who did it?” and not on “what can we do to fix it?”.
 
Self-sabotaging behavior not only affects your life, but it also affects other people as well. When children are involved, it’s just confusing for them. After all, you’re trying to teach them the correct way to take responsibility.
 
3. You always want to fix people
 
I’ve spent two decades of my life in relationships fixing men. Let me tell you, it’s exhausting and it has taken a huge portion of my youth. It’s as if those years just went poof! right in front of me. I’m not trying to be insulting to anyone, it’s just that, I should have laid out the rules about who I am and then left if my expectations weren’t met.
 
Did I do that? No. Instead, I thought I could help them, change them, improve their standards in life. That was just so silly, and it still is.
 
Trying to fix people is like trying to nail jello to the wall. It just doesn’t stick, it doesn’t stay, and it makes a huge mess. Also, when you’re busy trying to fix people, you lose so much time on the things that matter the most, like your children and unconditional people in your life.
 
4. You’re using others to compare
 
I work at this all the time. I don’t find it as difficult as being judgemental, actually. Maybe I am too busy judging people to be jealous of them. However, every once in a while, I see happy people and wish I was like that. I see them smiling on social media and hugging loved ones. The picture says that their lives are perfect, but I know that those images are not the full truth.
 
But every once in a while, I sabotage my feelings when seeing marriages, Valentine’s gifts, and people who seem to have lots in common. I compare those things to the differences in my life, and I catch myself wishing my family was closer. It’s like falling into a trap, and then destroying yourself while you’re in there. It can be ruthless.
 
5. You magnify the negative
 
You never fail to notice every single negative thing that happens, but the positive things slip right by so easily. To be fair, many times, the negative things are things that happen over and over no matter how many times you’ve asked for them to stop, or how many times you’ve worked on making it better.
 
This makes it incredibly hard to see the victories as wins. In response to this, you develop depression and anxiety trying to make things work. You don’t mean to do it, but you sabotage any hope you could have by moving forward.
 
6. Worrying about what others think
 
I don’t do this much, but when I do, I make sure I worry incessantly. I guess you might say, I only worry about the things that will affect me personally. No, I don’t worry about what people think of my style or my hobbies, but I do worry about the fact that people probably think I am mean.
 
I can thank the men trying to manipulate those thoughts in my head. I am introverted, and most of us really don’t care about what others think, but sometimes, we would like to be accepted the way we are, and we sabotage ourselves trying to be something we’re not.
 
Okay, so, how are we going to stop this?
 
Well, first of all, we all need some time alone to think. We need to figure out if the place we’re at is our true destination, or are we supposed to make a change. This knowledge may take some time. Like I said about the dog, when it hurts bad enough, you will get up, and get out of the situation.
 
We should never forget what makes us happy as individuals. This doesn’t include what makes our husbands or wives happy. This is about us and us alone.
 
We should also make sure to take full responsibility for our actions but refuse to take responsibility for what someone else has done. Don’t let anyone convince you that something they’ve done is your fault. That can be a form of gaslighting. And having a healthy amount of care about how people think of you is okay. It does matter, but not to the point that you have to conform to a dress code or majority standard.
 
And then remember to be positive once in a while. Even though someone may be driving you crazy with their idiocy, try to see the good in every single moment. If you can’t see good where you’re sitting, leave the room and find it somewhere else.
 
I hope this has helped you to stop sabotaging your life. As for me, I’m still working on it, and I’m telling you, when I get it worked out, I don’t plan on making these same mistakes. Let’s hope not.
 
Be blessed.
 

 

Sherrie Hurd

 

 

Copyright © 2012-2020 Learning Mind. All rights reserved. For permission to reprint, contact us. 

 

 

 



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No religious or political creed is advocated here.

Organised religion is unnecessary to spirituality.

Excellent teachings of the masters have been contaminated by the dogmatic control of these religions.

Discernment yes; judgement does not.
If you use discernment you are free to research with an open mind. 

With discernment it is possible to reach the spirit of the letter of any writing and it is also much easier to listen to the voice of the soul that comes from the heart.
Individually you can be helped to find your Truth that is different of everyone. 


Please respect all credits.

 
Discernment is recommended.
 

All articles are of the respective authors and/or publishers responsibility. 


 

 

Like this! please bookmark. It is updated daily

 


 
 
 
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publicado por achama às 02:22
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Sexta-feira, 14 de Fevereiro de 2020

10 Things Parents of Genius Kids Should Do, a 45-Year Study Reveals

10 Things Parents of Genius Kids Should Do, a 45-Year Study Reveals

Michelle Liew 

Contributor writer to Learning Mind.

February 13th, 2019.

 
 
 


 
 
Parents all hope that their children will become the Albert Einsteins of the modern world. But raising genius kids takes quite a bit of effort.
 
Bringing up a child prodigy is no mean feat. The task overwhelms a parent with both fear and wonder. How is a hassled parent to cope with a little brainiac? We have answers for parents blessed with little beings with unbridled talents.
 
A 45-Year Study on Genius Children
 
A 45-year study involving dedicated researcher Julian Stanley tracked the development of 5000 intellectually precocious children over 45 years. Stanley hoped that he would learn how to boost the potential of such talented individuals. He wasn’t merely interested in studying them; Stanley wanted to cultivate their intellect and improve the chances they would make a difference to this world.
 
Things to Do to Support Genius Kids
 
The study prompted talent-development researchers like Camilla Benbow, Dean of Education and Human Development at Nashville’s Vanderbilt University, to uncover what to best do to help children who have a mental edge over others. She has a few suggestions to bring out the genius in kids.
 
1. Give your little geniuses opportunities
 
A kid who has the genius within will want to develop his or her interests. Give them chances to learn as much as they can.
 
If your kids come to you with requests to learn the piano and you have heard them sound chords without ever having learned them, it may be time for them to take more than a few music lessons. They may have more musicality than you imagine.
 
Ask what your children prefer, be it numbers, music, languages or science. Then, let them learn the skills necessary to excel in that area. Once they’ve mastered the basics, let them be creative and play around with what they’ve learned.
 
2. Diversity
 
These opportunities should also be as varied as you can make them. Let your genius children have as many diverse experiences as possible. Remember that highly intelligent children require cognitive stretching, so help them to flex their brain muscles. Whatever you introduce them to shouldn’t be too run-of-the-mill.
 
Instead of just bringing them to the beach or for a swim, why not get them to compile science scrapbooks of the unusual flower specimens they can find? They could learn their names. Why not utilize their mobile phones for education instead of Whatsapp messaging? They could capture videos of the unusual creatures of flowers they see.
 
3. Help your child both intellectually and emotionally
 
Providence has blessed your geniuses with large intellectual capacities, so stimulating their intellect is a must. They will feel underwhelmed if you don’t.
 
And that’s when you’ll experience the difficulties of raising geniuses. They’ll feel unchallenged and neglected if you don’t give them the mental challenges they need.
 
Also, they may develop unhealthy arrogance and egocentrism if you don’t pull the reins. Emotional management is essential. Let them understand that the intelligence that they have is a gift to use wisely.
 
5. Applaud efforts, not abilities
 
As mentioned above, pride comes before a fall. When adults place too much focus on how smart they are, these little wonders may take their intellect for granted.
 
They may see studying as unnecessary. Help your geniuses realize that they should reach for the stars and that it takes perseverance. Even geniuses fail. They will also learn to challenge themselves intellectually and not let failure daunt them.
 
Making friends could become a challenge for kids who have genius if they see themselves as “smarter than the average bear.” They may offend their peers or not make friends altogether. Therefore, praise their efforts and avoid emphasizing how brilliant they are. They already know.
 
6. Don’t label your child geniuses
 
Labels are unhealthy because they stigmatize and pressurize. Calling your children geniuses also stereotypes them and deprives them of friendship opportunities. You may find your little light bulbs trying too hard to shine, and they may dim altogether. The label may put too much pressure on them to please you or live up to expectations.
 
7. Work with teachers
 
Parents may not be genius children themselves. Raising them is a challenge. How are they to ensure that their kids have all the mental, intellectual, and emotional stimulation they need?
 
The answer could come from your child’s teachers. Do consult them over which programs to enroll your kids in, and how to give them the mental boost they need. Your child’s teacher would be the best person to advise you on how to manage their friendships too. Smart kids need challenges and the ability to work at their paces.
 
8. Test your child’s ability
 
If you think that your kid is a genius, satisfy your nagging feelings. Get their IQs professionally tested by child psychologists. Doing so will satisfy your curiosity as well as theirs. You will discover how to move forward with your children.
9. Let your children be responsible for their decisions
 
Genius should come with maturity, so you should let your children make decisions for themselves. It’s an essential ingredient for developing resilient, strong personalities. Your little geniuses will be comfortable with themselves if they know that you trust them to use their smarts wisely.
 
10. Support, don’t impose
 
If your geniuses have class projects, let them complete these independently. Don’t impose your thinking on them. Give suggestions, but don’t tell them that there’s a “right” way to do it. They’ll have confidence in their abilities if they see if they can complete tasks themselves.
 
It’s an enormous responsibility to raise genius kids. We hope that these tips steer you in the right direction.
 
 
Michelle Liew.
 

 


About the Author: 

Michelle Liew


Michelle is a freelance writer who loves all things about life. She has a broad range of interests that include literature, history, philosophy, human relationships, and psychology. When she is not busy writing her heart out, you will find her tinkering jazz tunes on her piano. She loves anything that helps her to grow as a person, including her pet terriers, Misty and Cloudy.

COPYRIGHT © 2020 LEARNING MIND. ALL RIGHTS RESERVED. FOR PERMISSION TO REPRINT, CONTACT US.
 



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No religious or political creed is advocated here.

Organised religion is unnecessary to spirituality.

Excellent teachings of the masters have been contaminated by the dogmatic control of these religions.

Discernment yes; judgement does not.
If you use discernment you are free to research with an open mind. 

With discernment it is possible to reach the spirit of the letter of any writing and it is also much easier to listen to the voice of the soul that comes from the heart.
Individually you can be helped to find your Truth that is different of everyone. 


Please respect all credits.

 
Discernment is recommended.
 

All articles are of the respective authors and/or publishers responsibility. 
 
 
 
Free counters!

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publicado por achama às 00:49
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Quinta-feira, 13 de Fevereiro de 2020

How Distinction Bias Is Tricking You into Making the Wrong Choices

How Distinction Bias Is Tricking You into Making the Wrong Choices.

Lauren Edwards-Fowle.

learning-mind.com

Posted February 12th, 2020.

 



 
We all like to think we are in control of our decisions, but these are often influenced by many factors around us, leading our thought processes in one direction.
 
What is distinction bias?
 
Distinction bias is the influence of making a choice when presented with two similar options side by side simultaneously. This is a tactic often used by retailers, who display a system of ‘good, better and best’ products alongside each other.
 
 
It may be that the best product is manufactured to the same standard and performs the same as the good product. However, the price differential creates a perception of quality and drives the customer to buy the more expensive item.
 
This applies to many scenarios where your own instinctive choice is interrupted by a comparable which makes you reconsider.
 
How does it affect relationships?
 
If you find someone really attractive and enjoy spending time with them, it would be natural to consider taking things further. You aren’t presented with a raft of options to compare against one another. You are guided by your feelings, emotions and instinct.
 
However, if they are introduced next to their twin who is slightly taller and perhaps better dressed, would you still proceed with your intuitive response to get to know your initial crush? Or, would you subconsciously start comparing them with another person simply because they are standing next to each other?
 
Can it change the way we treat people?
 
It most certainly can, and does. A great example is that of behavior comparisons. This happens most around people you know well, such as your child or your spouse. You have a preconceived idea about their personality, and how they behave. This means that when something out of the ordinary happens, you immediately start comparing their actions or words with their everyday persona.
 
Examples of distinction bias in real life
 
Situations which you would consider perfectly acceptable in anybody else become the kindle for an argument. For example, you have spent a lot of time choosing your child’s party fancy dress outfit and think they look fabulous. You take lots of pictures and are really proud. Then you take them to a party, and some of the other kids have outfits much more elaborate than yours. Are you suddenly feeling a little inadequate, or that you should have made more effort?
 
Why? Five minutes ago you were glowing with pride!
 
The same can apply to working alongside a spouse. In their everyday life, they are friendly, amiable and easy-going. When you work together on a project, you find them bossy, loud and controlling. In actuality, any other professional leading a project in the same way would be fine with you. However, because it is your spouse, and you are now seeing them contrasted with their persona at home, you find it irksome and annoying.
 
 
Why? They’re a great professional doing their job!
 
Can we avoid being influenced by distinction bias?
 
Yes, we can – being aware that it exists, and that we are all susceptible to being influenced is important in so many ways. The old cliché of the grass being greener on the other side rings true. However, it is human nature to analyze our choices more carefully when we have another, perhaps ‘better’ option available, which might negate our happiness with our gut instinct.
 
Often, taking a step back from making a decision and being able to rationalize and think about the choices we make – or are about to make – is a great way to avoid making a poor choice without having really understood why.
 
If you are buying something and have set yourself a budget, try to remember that. Don’t be driven by the glossy packaging of a product which is marketed in a way to influence you to spend more money than you need to.
 
Where does distinction bias most affect us?
 
One of the biggest places within modern life where distinction bias causes negative effects is social media. Every platform presents the user with multiple images, people and products all displayed side by side.
 
This scenario creates a situation where we are constantly making comparisons and scrutinizing which person, or which product, is ‘the best’. This culture of comparison leads to toxic emotions such as jealousy, resentment, and lack of self-worth.
 
Remember that social media is a place where every person and company showcase the very best of themselves. Individual images or captions are highly unlikely to be indicative of daily life.
 
There is a growing movement to be more conscious of the alternate reality which is presented online. Particularly where influencers or celebrities target adverts manipulating the fears of groups of people, there is new legislation being introduced to regulate this. It can be all too easy for a young impressionable person to feel bombarded with pictures of beautiful, slim strangers. They might feel that they look differently and become convinced that they are not worth as much.
 
In this situation, it is extremely powerful to remember that this is another symptom of distinction bias. There is absolutely no need to compare your visual identity to that of anybody else. Looking at each part of your life in direct comparison with others is not a healthy way to make life choices.
 
How can we live our lives free of cognitive bias?
 
In reality, it is probably impossible to never allow any outside influence to impact our way of thinking. Salespeople love to think they ‘can’t be sold to’, but we all respond to factors in a human way.
 
Being mindful of your thoughts, how much pressure you put on yourself to make a decision, and analyzing why you are making a choice are all simple ways to keep on track. Being accountable for your decisions, particularly organizational or financial ones that impact your family, can help you to rationalize your actions and keep your focus on what you set out to achieve without deviating.
 
 
References:
  1. Psychology Today
  2. Research Gate

Lauren Edwards-Fowle
 
 
Copyright © 2012-2019 Learning Mind. All rights reserved. For permission to reprint, contact us.
 

 

 
About the Author: Lauren Edwards-Fowle


 
Lauren Edwards-Fowle is a professional copywriter based in South East England. Lauren worked within Children's Services for five years before moving into the business sector. She holds an MSc in Applied Accountancy and BSc in Corporate Law. She now volunteers within the community sport sector, helping young people to live healthier, more productive lifestyles and overcome the barriers to inclusion that they face. With a keen interest in physical wellbeing, nutrition and sports, Lauren enjoys participating in a variety of team sports in her spare time, as well as spending time with her young family and their dog Scout.
 



Compiled by http://violetflame.biz.ly from: 
 
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A Trusty with Privacy Search 
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No religious or political creed is advocated here.

Organised religion is unnecessary to spirituality.

Excellent teachings of the masters have been contaminated by the dogmatic control of these religions.

Discernment yes; judgement does not.
If you use discernment you are free to research with an open mind. 

With discernment it is possible to reach the spirit of the letter of any writing and it is also much easier to listen to the voice of the soul that comes from the heart.
Individually you can be helped to find your Truth that is different of everyone. 


Please respect all credits.

 
Discernment is recommended.
 

All articles are of the respective authors and/or publishers responsibility. 


 

 

Like this! please bookmark. It is updated daily

 


 
 
 
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publicado por achama às 01:50
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Terça-feira, 11 de Fevereiro de 2020

The Cult of Spiritual Materialism: Have You Become Its Victim?

The Cult of Spiritual Materialism:

 Have You Become Its Victim?

Becky Storey.

https://www.learning-mind.com/

February 10, 2020

 

 
 
Spiritualism is growing in popularity as we seek more answers and comfort in these trying times. Unfortunately, no everyone is following the spiritual path for the right reasons, or in a genuine way. There is no correct way to practice your spiritualism, but there are certainly incorrect ways. Spiritual materialism is being actively encouraged at every turn.
 
If you’re taking on a new, enlightened path, chances are that you’ve already come across a few traps. Spirituality teaches us self-forgiveness and a non-judgemental attitude, though. Apply these principles when considering whether you have become a victim of spiritual materialism. We can all be swayed easily at times.
 
What Is Spiritual Materialism?
 
A person becomes spiritually materialistic when they develop materialistic and shallow desires in the pursuit of spirituality. The ego tends to use spiritualism for its own gain, to fulfill the need to be special or interesting.
 
Our egos are the parts of our identities created by external influences, like comments from others, possessions, and achievements. This conceited part of us takes advantage of spirituality. We are in an era of “new-age spiritualism”, where the original traditions are being forgotten and replaced with modern ideas – and not always good ones.
 
Spiritually materialistic people are likely to be using the popularity of spiritualism to boost their own sense of self. Living a spiritual kind of lifestyle gives some people a feeling that they are above others, sometimes even God-like. Instagram “gurus” are popular but are, in fact, benefitting from spiritual materialism.
 
If your spiritualism requires the rest of the world seeing it, sponsorships and merchandise, then it’s likely not spiritualism at all. It’s pandering to a market the world seems to want right now.
 
We’re often sold “tools” to further our spiritual journey, but these things only add to the materialism. True spiritualism happens within and doesn’t require external resources. We convince ourselves that we need “things” to boost our connection with the spiritual realm, but these things only boost our ego and decay our self-awareness. We show off our possessions like trophies, to compete with others to prove who is the most spiritual.
Why Is Shallow Spirituality a Problem Today?
 
Spiritualism is a deep and personal experience. It is all about finding your inner strength, inner truth, and inner peace. When you add materialism into the mix, it becomes shallow and superficial.
 
Being spiritual has become fad-like these days and proving how spiritual we are is becoming a competition. You might notice more people are attending retreats or workshops and posting about it all over social media. Surely, this undermines the purpose? Spiritualism teaches us to be happy with ourselves and not compare our lives to others. A truly spiritual person does not need to use their experiences for attention, their experience is sacred and personal.
 
Aside from using spiritualism for materialistic gain, some people also use it to rid themselves of their troubles. True spiritual gurus encourage the use of spiritualism to become comfortable with suffering. Spiritual materialists assume that methods such as yoga and meditation will prevent ever having to experience hardship.
 
 
This is not realistic and not what the original spiritualists had intended. Spiritual practices are there to have you develop self-awareness and learn to be peaceful even in times of trouble. Spiritual materialism encourages the avoidance of suffering, which closes us off from the world – a total contrast to genuine spiritualism.
 
Arguably the most concerning problem with spiritual materialism is that it leads to cultural appropriation and fetishization of particular countries. Backpackers head off to countries like Thailand, India, and Vietnam to “embrace” the spiritual culture. Unfortunately, these people tend to pick and choose the traditions they like and ignore those they don’t.
 
This can be offensive to the traditional spiritualists who devote their lives to religions like Buddhism. Spiritually materialistic people travel to these countries to take photos posing in front of sacred monuments – instead of respecting the culture’s wishes.
Are You a Victim of Spiritual Materialism?
 
There are a few ways to tell if you’ve fallen victim to this superficial, materialistic spirituality. Approach the idea with an open mind and a judgment-free attitude. If you notice elements of yourself reflected in the signs, forgive heavily and correct gently. Spiritualism only ever teaches self-improvement for your own gain, not to compare yourself to others.
Shopping
 
There is no part of spiritualism that encourages money spending. You should be able to practice spiritualism no matter your financial status. Whether it’s expensive retreats or small trinkets, no genuine spiritualist would require any external “tools”.
 
Traditional spiritualists would shudder at the notion that you have to spend your money to be a “better” spiritualist. Some teachings, like apps and books, might require payment, and while they’re great additions, they aren’t essential. There are plenty of free resources out there provided by true believers who want spiritualism to be accessible to everyone.
Sharing
 
We love oversharing on social media, but we love to show off even more. For example, the Instagram hashtag #spiritualist is filled with odd quotes and unrelated selfies. It’s cool to be spiritual, and this leads to people sharing it more than they practice it.
 
 
You might have fallen victim to spiritual materialism if you spend time wondering how you can curate your posts to appear more spiritual. The spiritual journey is a personal experience and doesn’t require you to share it with others.
Forcing
 
It is possible to overdo it on the meditation. Spiritually materialistic people tend to force themselvesinto practicing spirituality even when their minds and bodies don’t really want it. This is because they want to be the most spiritual, and surely you can’t do that if you don’t put in the hours?
 
Spirituality should be a journey you take at your own pace, through thought and self-discovery. Some critics even mention hallucinogenic drugs as a part of spiritual materialism, as users tend to force and expect epiphanies. You should be able to reach enlightenment and understand your true purpose without any outside help, it is within you.
Spiritual materialism is easy to fall into in this modern world.
 
We’re told we need stuff in order to be the best, but no one tells us there is no best. Take your new spiritual journey in your own stride and always remember that everything you need is already with you. No amount of force, travel or excessive practice will bring it to you any faster. Focus on your own thoughts and your own progress.
References:
  1. https://pro.psychcentral.com
  2. https://en.wikipedia.org

 

Becky Storey
 

 




 

About the Author: Becky Storey


 
Becky Storey is a professional writer who has been passionate about the way we think and the human mind since she developed chronic anxiety many years ago. Now she loves to write and educate people on mental health and wellbeing. When Becky is not writing, you’ll find her outside with her Labrador, sitting behind a jigsaw puzzle, or baking something with too much sugar.
 
Copyright © 2012-2019 Learning Mind. All rights reserved. For permission to reprint, contact us.
 



Compiled by http://violetflame.biz.ly from: 
 
Archives:

 

 
 

A Trusty with Privacy Search 
Alternative to Google
startpage.com

Alternative to YouTube
brighteon.com

 
 



No religious or political creed is advocated here.

Organised religion is unnecessary to spirituality.

Excellent teachings of the masters have been contaminated by the dogmatic control of these religions.

Discernment yes; judgement does not.
If you use discernment you are free to research with an open mind. 

With discernment it is possible to reach the spirit of the letter of any writing and it is also much easier to listen to the voice of the soul that comes from the heart.
Individually you can be helped to find your Truth that is different of everyone. 


Please respect all credits.

 
Discernment is recommended.
 

All articles are of the respective authors and/or publishers responsibility. 


 

 

Like this! please bookmark. It is updated daily

 


 
 
 
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publicado por achama às 04:40
link | comentar | favorito
Sexta-feira, 7 de Fevereiro de 2020

What Is a Spiritual Atheist and What It Means to Be One

What Is a Spiritual Atheist and What It Means to Be One

Becky Storey.

https://www.learning-mind.com/

February 6, 2020

 

 
 
Spirituality can be a very vague term and has many unique definitions depending on who you ask. It is often assumed to be connected to religions, but some might disagree. Spiritual atheists aren’t religious at all but instead, believe in “spirit” by another definition.
 
To put it simply, a spiritual person is someone who is not concerned with material matters. They are concerned about the universe itself and use this feeling to navigate their days. This can be called an “energy”. We all have our own energy, as does the universe. Energy can be a feeling, an emotion, or just a “vibe”.
 
What Is a Spiritual Atheist?
 
A spiritual atheist is someone who, unlike a religious person, does not believe in any “God”. Instead, they believe in a higher consciousness that cannot be represented as a physical being. They believe the universe governs itself through actions and intentions.
 
This spirit flows amongst us all and connects everyone and everything on every scale, from minor coincidences to major global changes. Spiritual atheists believe each person has a soul that should be tended to, and a hard to define spirit which flows amongst us, similar to the energy, but more personal and unique to the individual.
 
Spiritual atheists believe in ideas like Karma, which govern us through consequences equal to our actions. If you put good into the universe, you will have a good life in return. This contrasts with the religious idea that God decides our fate.
 
Astrophysicist Neil deGrasse Tyson considers himself a spiritual atheist and in one famous quote, explains why the universe connects us all and why our lives are more meaningful than they might seem at times.
 
He says: “We are all connected; To each other, biologically. To the earth, chemically. And to the rest of the universe, atomically.”
 
In our modern times, religion is becoming less popular, especially among young people. The advances in science can make religion seem unappealing, and yet still, we crave meaning. Spiritual atheists find meaning in their lives through devotion to the universe, others and themselves. Their purpose is to improve, nurture and learn in order to reach their true path.
 
The Butterfly Effect
 
Spiritual Atheism can be linked to the Butterfly Effect – both a spiritual and physics-based theory. Spirituality and science are becoming more linked, and this is no exception.
 
The butterfly effect tells us that the tiniest of actions, such as a butterfly flapping its wings, can have massive impacts. It may be far in the future or far away, but every action has a reaction.
 
In spiritual terms, this means a spiritual atheist is more compassionate and considerate of the world around them as well as themselves. They are aware of their actions and behave intentionally to influence the world in their chosen way.
 
How Does a Spiritual Atheist Think?
 
Spiritual atheists are more aware of their thoughts and mental state than others. They may practice meditation to help them understand themselves and discover their true purpose.
 
They are deep thinkers and often philosophers. It means that they seek to answer the most important questions in life without relying on the idea of a physical God. Instead, they take responsibility for their own lives.
 
Spiritual atheists govern their own lives using their own rules, which typically develop around their core values and priorities. These tend to include matters such as kindness and compassion for other beings.
 
These values dictate their behavior in order to create positive karma for themselves and add positivity to the world around them. This differs greatly from religion, where the rules they must live by are dictated in scripture.
 
The beliefs of spiritual atheists are similar to those of the Buddhists. Buddhism is a path to enlightenment and living life well. It is often misunderstood as worshiping Buddha, but true believers will note that the intention is to follow in his path, not pray and devote themselves to him.
 
Why Spiritual Atheism Makes Sense
 
Ultimately, being a spiritual atheist is a way to add meaning and value to your life without relying on the structure of religion and debating the rules it sets. For matters such as the clothes we wear and even the food we eat, religion can feel outdated. Spirituality allows us to stay connected to the universe and each other without the obstacle’s religion brings.
 
The issue of an all-powerful and almost supernatural “god” choosing who lives or dies or suffers and succeeds is widely debated. With spirituality, we understand that we are in charge of what happens to us.
 
Through matters like Karma, the butterfly effect and responsibility, we dictate what happens to us. It also brings comfort to the suffering we don’t feel we deserve, by explaining that the universe cannot always be predicted.
 
We put faith in the idea that everything happens for a reason, even if we can’t see it yet. Each moment of our lives is connected, and one tragedy could change our lives for the better eventually.
 
Why It Encourages Self-Improvement
 
Spiritual atheism encourages self-betterment, while some complain that religion does not. Instead of reliance on an external God to “guide us”, we take responsibility for our own actions and the consequences involved. This encourages compassion for our fellow beings, the desire to work on ourselves and more self-awareness.
 
Spiritual atheism can seem to be a complicated concept and may differ in the mind of each person, but it is simple at heart. It is the belief that the universe is connected and that our actions, thoughts, and intentions have an impact on ourselves, others and the world around us.
 
Spiritual atheists believe in being positive influences on all scales to better themselves and the way they live. They work towards enlightenment, which will allow them to discover their true purpose on this Earth.
 
Between this and their values and morals, a spiritual atheist will devote their lives to achieving these goals and living as fully and as well as possible.
 
References:
  1. http://theconversation.com
  2. https://www.goodreads.com
 

Becky Storey
 

 




 

About the Author: Becky Storey


 
Becky Storey is a professional writer who has been passionate about the way we think and the human mind since she developed chronic anxiety many years ago. Now she loves to write and educate people on mental health and wellbeing. When Becky is not writing, you’ll find her outside with her Labrador, sitting behind a jigsaw puzzle, or baking something with too much sugar.
 
Copyright © 2012-2019 Learning Mind. All rights reserved. For permission to reprint, contact us.
 



Compiled by http://violetflame.biz.ly from: 
 
Archives:

 

 
 

A Trusty with Privacy Search 
Alternative to Google
startpage.com

Alternative to YouTube
brighteon.com

 
 



No religious or political creed is advocated here.

Organised religion is unnecessary to spirituality.

Excellent teachings of the masters have been contaminated by the dogmatic control of these religions.

Discernment yes; judgement does not.
If you use discernment you are free to research with an open mind. 

With discernment it is possible to reach the spirit of the letter of any writing and it is also much easier to listen to the voice of the soul that comes from the heart.
Individually you can be helped to find your Truth that is different of everyone. 


Please respect all credits.

 
Discernment is recommended.
 

All articles are of the respective authors and/or publishers responsibility. 


 

 

Like this! please bookmark. It is updated daily

 


 
 
 
Free counters!

  geoglobe1
 
 
publicado por achama às 02:22
link | comentar | favorito
Terça-feira, 4 de Fevereiro de 2020

The Toxic Habit of Blaming Yourself for Everything and How to Stop It

 

The Toxic Habit of Blaming Yourself for Everything and How to Stop It.

Sherrie Hurd.

learning-mind.com

Posted February 3rd, 2020.

 
 

 
Blaming yourself for everything will not solve all the problems. In fact, it will cause many more. It has to stop.
 
I have an example of two sides of a coin that are both toxic – that would be self-blame and being irresponsible. Honestly, I don’t know which one is worse. These traits come from many types of influence, including upbringing or abuse, which are a bit different.
 
Where the habit of blaming yourself is born
 
Could it be, that long ago you became the scapegoat in your family? A scapegoat is someone who always stepped in and took the blame in every situation. Sometimes they were pushed gradually into that position, while other times they learned that taking the blame often ended the arguments in the family.
 
You know, when this happens as a child, blaming yourself grows into a toxic habit that follows you into adulthood. On what a dysfunctional relationship could be formed with an irresponsible mate and a scapegoat. The thought makes me cringe.
 
Why is this character trait so toxic?
 
There are a few ways that putting all the blame on yourself can be toxic. First of all, you have no control when you are always to blame. You relinquish your control by admitting that you have failed when you probably haven’t done so. Your life cannot be better or stand out from the rest in a good way either.
 
When you blame yourself, you squander the hopes and dreams you would have if you looked at the situation logically and put the blame where it belonged.
 
How can we stop blaming ourselves?
 
1. Have a little compassion
 
Maybe it’s easy to be compassionate to others, but what about yourself? Are you showing yourself the love and respect that you should? If you learn how to understand your strengths and weaknesses, you can see where you might need to go easy on yourself.
 
Whether or not you are to blame, which is not every single time, learn to treat yourself the same regardless. And of course, if you are to blame, then apologize, just not over and over.
 
2. Be able to change
 
When you visualize yourself, do you see someone that’s stone, or do you see soft clay? Let’s just pretend we do this, and maybe we should start if we don’t. Well, let’s not try to see ourselves as something which is hard to change or cannot be changed, but rather, as someone who is malleable, and able to adjust accordingly.
 
So instead of blaming yourself, you’re probably set in stone in what you believe. It’s similar to being the scapegoat, being something that never really changes. Being able to change can help you discover where true blame lies.
 
3. Learn who you are
 
If you never really had an opportunity to get to know yourself, then you will never know the truth about blame. It will be incredibly difficult to know if you are to blame or not if you don’t even know your own personality. To some people, this may sound silly. They may be saying, “Well, I know who I am, I’m Fred and I live in blah blah blah…etc” but that’s not what I mean.
 
I mean your inner identity. Yes, you have one, and most people know this. Blaming yourself for something you didn’t do becomes hard when you know you never do these things in question. So, don’ take fake blame, and don’t allow anyone to put fake blame on you either.
 
4. Change friends
 
If you’re still hanging around friends who help you blame yourself, then those friends are not for you. At some point, you took the blame for something that one of your friends was responsible for, and since then, you’ve been their scapegoat. You’ve developed a toxic clique, and you must get away.
 
When you find new friends, make sure you’ve become firmly acquainted with who you are, and if they try to blame you for something you didn’t do, stand up for yourself.
 
5. Blame and responsibility
 
Before you leave the blame behind with this new powerful path of escape from self-blame, make sure you really aren’t responsible. You should take responsibility for what you do, but not for what you don’t do, so….take some time and learn everything you can about these two words. Be honest with yourself and with others.
 
6. Adopt a clear mind
 
Just like most other issues, mindfulness is a great solution. Our minds can become so full of things like appointments, ideas, work, children, and our mates, among other things. It’s easy to let your mind become cluttered so bad that you will take the blame just to keep from adding more clutter to your mind.
 
Maybe you can take the blame, apologize and move on instead of trying to figure out what really occurred. With mindfulness, including meditation, you can clear out some of the clutter. This happens because mindfulness brings peace which allows us to tackle each thing in our mind, one at a time until it’s a bit clearer. This will help you understand who’s truly to blame in situations.
 
Killing a toxic habit
 
Just like it’s toxic for someone to never take the blame, it is also toxic blaming yourself for everything, and deep down, I think you know that. Step by step, we can learn the differencebetween these sides of the same coin, and place the blame or responsibility where it belongs.
 

 

Sherrie Hurd

 

 

Copyright © 2012-2019 Learning Mind. All rights reserved. For permission to reprint, contact us. 

 

 

 



Compiled by http://violetflame.biz.ly from: 
 
Archives:
 

 
 

A Trusty with Privacy Search 
Alternative to Google
startpage.com

Alternative to YouTube
brighteon.com
 
 



No religious or political creed is advocated here.

Organised religion is unnecessary to spirituality.

Excellent teachings of the masters have been contaminated by the dogmatic control of these religions.

Discernment yes; judgement does not.
If you use discernment you are free to research with an open mind. 

With discernment it is possible to reach the spirit of the letter of any writing and it is also much easier to listen to the voice of the soul that comes from the heart.
Individually you can be helped to find your Truth that is different of everyone. 


Please respect all credits.

 
Discernment is recommended.
 

All articles are of the respective authors and/or publishers responsibility. 


 

 

Like this! please bookmark. It is updated daily

 


 
 
 
Free counters!

  geoglobe1
 
 
publicado por achama às 02:30
link | comentar | favorito

The Feynman Technique and How to Use It to Learn and Understand Anything

The Feynman Technique and How to Use It to Learn and Understand Anything

Becky Storey.

https://www.learning-mind.com/

February 3, 2020

 

 
 
Studying is stressful. It often leads to feelings of self-doubt and leaves us overwhelmed. We try our best (usually) and still sometimes we just cannot get our heads around a subject. We’re taught dozens of memory tricks and studying hacks, but nothing really sticks. Fortunately, there is a proven technique, used by Nobel-prize winning scientists, that will help you learn and understand whatever you want. The Feynman Technique is a renowned method for studying and learning.
 
It is based on the idea that if you can’t describe something in its simplest terms, then you probably don’t understand it. It was originally used on complex mathematical and science-based theories, but it’s great for any subject.
 
 
In particular, it’s great for those tricky subjects that require you to understand a concept, not just remember facts. By requiring you to practice active recall, you learn better than just reading and writing.
 
Origins of The Feynman Technique
 
This ingenious technique for studying and learning was created by Richard Feynman during his years at Princeton University. He went on to be a world-renowned physicist and a Nobel-prize winner. He was known as the “great explainer” because of his ability to put complex matters into the simplest of terms.
 
Richard Feynman discovered that if he couldn’t explain something simply, then he didn’t really understand it. During his time at university, he filled entire notebooks with topics he wanted to learn. He took on each topic and broke them down into tiny parts until he understood the entire concept.
 
The method spread in popularity and became known as the Feynman Technique. The theory behind the technique is that if you understand something fully, you can explain it simply. When we genuinely understand an idea or concept, we consider it simple. It’s not complicated in our minds, so we can discuss it in uncomplicated terms.
 
The Feynman Technique also gives learners the opportunity to see their problem areas clearly. You’ll either find yourself stuck with some parts with not enough information or, you’ll resort to using complicated language and jargon.
 
Have you ever noticed that if someone pretentious is trying to sound smarter, they use bigger words? This is because they think it makes them sound more intelligent, but in fact, they’re likely like regurgitating the study materials. If you can’t avoid the complicated words, it’s probably because you don’t know the topic well enough. If you can’t use your own words to explain something, you don’t understand it.
 
How to Do the Feynman Technique
 
Choose Your Topic
  • Decide what it is you want to learn. This technique is best used for subjects that require critical thinking and understanding.
Teach It to A Child
  • Explain your subject in a way a child would understand (or just somebody with no background in the subject).
  • This means breaking it right down and using the simplest language.
  • You could do this out loud to yourself or write it down if you don’t have someone else to help.
Identify Your Missing Knowledge
  • Make a note of what you struggled with.
  • Notice places where you used over-complicated wording and jargon to explain.
  • Notice places where you couldn’t recall the information.
Fix Your Missing Knowledge
  • Go back to the books.
  • Break down the knowledge you were missing into simple parts and understandable terms.
  • Re-learn the information.
Repeat these stages until you’re confident that you understand all of the information and you can explain it in simple understandable terms.
 
Benefits of the Feynman Technique
 
Unlike other studying methods, the Feynman Technique ensures a complete understanding of your subject. This technique increases our ability to think critically and analyse the topic. With a simple overall understanding of the concept, we are able to give opinions. This is particularly beneficial for essay writing and evaluations.
 
The Feynman Technique is great for those who don’t have strong language skills, like Richard Feynman himself. It actively encourages the use of simple language and doesn’t require writing if you don’t want to. It strips away the niche jargon which can complicate matters without knowing the extra definitions.
 
 
Instead of learning facts, figures, and definitions, the Feynman technique encourages holistic learning and true understanding.
 
Next time you’re struggling with exam prep and studying, give this technique a chance. It can be a quick and very straight forward method for learning. Cut out all the nonsense, all the note-taking, flashcards, and stress. Get a deep understanding of your subject in one simple hit.
 

Becky Storey
 

 




 

About the Author: Becky Storey


 
Becky Storey is a professional writer who has been passionate about the way we think and the human mind since she developed chronic anxiety many years ago. Now she loves to write and educate people on mental health and wellbeing. When Becky is not writing, you’ll find her outside with her Labrador, sitting behind a jigsaw puzzle, or baking something with too much sugar.
 
Copyright © 2012-2019 Learning Mind. All rights reserved. For permission to reprint, contact us.
 



Compiled by http://violetflame.biz.ly from: 
 
Archives:

 

 
 

A Trusty with Privacy Search 
Alternative to Google
startpage.com

Alternative to YouTube
brighteon.com

 
 



No religious or political creed is advocated here.

Organised religion is unnecessary to spirituality.

Excellent teachings of the masters have been contaminated by the dogmatic control of these religions.

Discernment yes; judgement does not.
If you use discernment you are free to research with an open mind. 

With discernment it is possible to reach the spirit of the letter of any writing and it is also much easier to listen to the voice of the soul that comes from the heart.
Individually you can be helped to find your Truth that is different of everyone. 


Please respect all credits.

 
Discernment is recommended.
 

All articles are of the respective authors and/or publishers responsibility. 


 

 

Like this! please bookmark. It is updated daily

 


 
 
 
Free counters!

  geoglobe1
 
 
publicado por achama às 02:20
link | comentar | favorito
Quinta-feira, 14 de Novembro de 2019

4 Systematic Desensitization Techniques to Use to Fight Your Anxiety and Fears

By Sherrie Hurd

learning-mind.com

on November 13th, 2019.

 
Systematic Desensitization Techniques.



 
How would you like to learn a few ways to battle your anxiety and fears? Well, systematic desensitization may be the answer.
 
During my lifetime, and that’s been 4 decades, I’ve tried everything I could think of to eliminate or even alleviate my anxiety. Some things helped pretty well, while other things just seemed like a waste of time. My fears and anxieties just continued to follow me wherever I went.
 
So, I saw the words, “systematic desensitization”, and I wondered if these were techniques that might work for me. It seemed like learning to face my fears through the help of a relaxing environment would much better than analyzing and deconstructing everything that happened to me. So, let’s examine this systematic desensitization approach.
 
What is systematic desensitization?
 
The systematic desensitization combines techniques of relaxation and gradual exposure to whatever is troubling you. If it’s a phobia, these techniques keep you calm, but they also coax you to face your fears, you see.
 
Of course, as you face these fears and anxieties, you start slow as not to cause an overwhelming sensation or possibly a panic attack.
The systematic desensitization techniques come in 4 steps:
 
1. Relaxation
 
Before you can even start approaching the subject of your fears and anxieties, you will need to learn how to relax. I don’t mean just sitting or lying down. I mean genuinely relaxing your entire being. Here are a few ways to properly relax:
 
Breathe slowly, inhaling through your nose. This is called diaphragmatic breathing. As you inhale, hold your breath for 2 seconds, then release your breath through your mouth. This type of breathing helps you relax pretty fast and helps you focus as well.
Now, close your eyes and imagine a scene. See the colors, hear the sounds, and even imagine you can smell the scents of this imaginary place. You can also let someone describe an image to you, and then see what they are describing utilizing your own mind.
 
Tense your muscles, then release them. Do this several times. This helps you understand what happens when you are afraid. You might not notice, but your muscles tense up all over your body during anxiety.
Take the time to learn more about meditation and mindfulness. These techniques help you accomplish all of the above and more. You can ground yourself in the presentinstead of saturating your mind tomorrow or the next day.
 
2. Making lists
 
After indulging in relaxation techniques, it’s time to make a list of what makes you anxious. You can include your phobias, or write them on a separate sheet of paper.
 
Either way, it’s important to try and list every single thing that triggers anxiety or fear. Knowing what makes you afraid is the key to facing the things that make you afraid.
 
You may be surprised by the things that come to mind. After all, you should list even the smallest things that make you afraid. This is especially helpful for those who start worrying as soon as they wake up.
 
I do this. I wake and wonder what negative things will happen during the day. It’s virtually taken over a corner of my life. So, I guess you would say, my list is long. But it doesn’t matter as long as you write it down and come to terms with it.
 
3. Rating your fears
 
After listing your fears, rate them at the worst and least fearful with everything else in-between. As you work through these things, other fears may surface, but you can’t let this distract you. Think about fears in different ways as well.
 
For instance, you may be terrified of spiders, which fall at level 10, but a picture of a spider may only rate on a level 7. Talking about them could be a level 5. Rating your fears helps you get ready for the last technique…coming to terms with your fears.
 
4. Facing fears
 
The first thing to do when facing your fears is to make sure you are totally relaxed. If you’re already going through something, it’s not quite the time to face fears and anxieties.
 
A good time would be in a quiet atmosphere, and it’s best to start with a therapist who can support and help you stay in control during the transition.
 
As you face your fears, you will imagine the fear first, then talk about what makes you anxious. As you talk through your anxieties, think about why you’re scared in the first place.
 
Where did the fear start, and how long has the fear been present? These are questions that will help you see the fear as something smaller than it really is. Therapy like this will slowly help you see your anxiety as something that cannot control you.
 
Final thoughts
 
It will take several sessions using the systematic desensitization techniques before you will notice a difference.
 
Over time, you may even be able to endure more than one fear at a time or face a fear during a stressful event. Until then, give yourself credit for every milestone you achieve toward your goal of being free of your fears.
 
References:
 
 
Sherrie Hurd.

 

 





 

About the Author: Sherrie Hurd


Sherrie Hurd is a professional writer and artist with over 10 years of experience. She is an advocate for mental health awareness and nutrition. Sherrie studied Psychology, Journalism, and Fine Arts, receiving an Associates in Marketing. She has written for Beacon, a southern college publication, and is an author of a full-length non-fiction novel. Sherrie spends most of her time giving life to the renegade thoughts. As the words erupt and form new life, she knows that she is yet again free from the nagging persistence of her muse.
 
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No religious or political creed is advocated here.

Organised religion is unnecessary to spirituality.

Excellent teachings of the masters have been contaminated by the dogmatic control of these religions.

Discernment yes; judgement does not.
If you use discernment you are free to research with an open mind. 

With discernment it is possible to reach the spirit of the letter of any writing and it is also much easier to listen to the voice of the soul that comes from the heart.
Individually you can be helped to find your Truth that is different of everyone. 


Please respect all credits.

 
Discernment is recommended.
 

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publicado por achama às 02:32
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Segunda-feira, 10 de Junho de 2019

How to Practice Self-Forgiveness When You Are Too Hard on Yourself ~ Sherrie.

How to Practice Self-Forgiveness When You Are Too Hard on Yourself.

By Sherrie.

June 9th, 2019

 

We must forgive others and sometimes we must practice self-forgiveness. No one is perfect. We all make mistakes.
Feeling bad for doing something wrong is normal. We should seek forgiveness when we’ve made mistakes or even been purposely cruel in the past.
However, dragging yourself through the mud for a long time after your regrets is not healthy. Self-forgiveness allows us to move on and learn how to be better people.

Have you been too hard on yourself?

When you mess up or make a mistake, how many times do you apologize? One apology, made in the right wayis enough to show you’re sorry for your actions.
When you apologize over and over, it doesn’t mean you’re any more or less sorry than with one heartfelt repentance. Sometimes groveling only makes some people use you and abuse your feelings. Try to remember that.

How can we practice self-forgiveness and self-love?

Some people can forgive themselves and be done with it, and some people get stuck in condemnation. I am sometimes those people. Lol
So, in order to practice self-forgiveness, we must sometimes first practice a few self-love tips. Here are some of the best.

1. An Inner dialogue on paper

When you have trouble forgiving yourself for something, you can try this: Write down how you’re feeling and take notice of the language you use when writing. Is your language positive? Well, probably not. But, you can use a positive outlook when talking to yourself about forgiveness.
Now, write down your good points. This includes your talents and strengths – basically, it’s all the things you like about yourself. Be honest. Do not describe yourself according to your shortcomings.
Write about the person you are separate from the mistakes you have made. This will help you gain perspective on your way to self-forgiveness.

2. Compassion

Just as you would show compassion toward someone else who made a mistake, and I hope you would, you must also use compassion with yourself.
You deserve a break because the world can be harsh, and no one is perfect. So, everyone needs compassion to try again. Even you need love to give it another shot.

3. Roleplay

Here’s an interesting way to forgive yourself. If you’re really being exceptionally hard on yourself, ask a friend to role play with you. Let your friend be you and take on the mistake that you made.
Now, pretend you are supposed to forgive them for what they’ve done, which is what you’ve done. I’m willing to bet that you will forgive them pretty easily.
Now, take your identity back and forgive yourself. At this point, you should be in a place where you can see your mistake as just a mistake, whether large or small.
You can move on with less guilt and condemnation than before. Thank your friend for the help and embrace the growth you’ve just gained.

4. Put the issue on hold

Even though the mistake may be bad, sometimes you have to put what you’ve done on holduntil you can process it correctly. It is okay to take it and store it in a mental box until later.
Now, as you’ve moved away from the mistake for a while, do things you enjoy and think better of yourself. When you feel strong enough, you can open the box and deal with what you’ve done. It’s usually easier to forgive yourself when you’ve done this.

5. Speak it

Words have so much power, both negative and positive. With some people, speaking aloud what they’ve done helps. This can lighten mental burdens and also help you see where you went wrong.
If you’ve hurt someone, you can see how and why you actually hurt them and the impact it had on their lives when you say what you’ve done.
In that process, you can find ways to heal from what you’ve done, and embrace self-forgiveness. If you’re feeling bad, just talk out loud to yourself or even to a friend.

6. See mistakes as learning

We all make mistakes from time to time. Like I said before, they can be large or small, doesn’t matter. When we make mistakes, we learn many things.
So, if you can see and feel what you’ve learned after doing wrong, you are making great progress. Forgiving yourself allows you to become a better you instead of wallowing in your sorrows.
This is unhealthy and doesn’t change anything that happened before. What’s done is done, and all you can do is try harder to be better.

Never be too hard on yourself

Self-forgiveness is necessary for living a full life. We will make so many mistakes that we will become accustomed to being flawed individuals. This is not to say we should do negative things and be proud of them, on the contrary.
We should always strive to be the kind and honorable in all situations. But if we fail, we should never be too hard on ourselves in an attempt to make things right. We must make amends and move on. It’s really the only way to truly practice self-forgiveness.
Have you forgiven yourself?
References:
  1. https://greatergood.berkeley.edu
  2. https://www.psychologytoday.com

 

 

 

 

 

 
 
About the Author: Sherrie

Sherrie is a freelance writer and artist with over 10 years of experience. She spends most of her time giving life to the renegade thoughts. As the words erupt and form new life, she knows that she is yet again free from the nagging persistence of her muse. She is a mother of three and a lifetime fan of the thought-provoking and questionable aspects of the universe.

COPYRIGHT © 2019 LEARNING MIND. ALL RIGHTS RESERVED. FOR PERMISSION TO REPRINT, CONTACT US.
 

 



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Please respect all credits.

 
Discernment is recommended.

 

All articles are of the respective authors and/or publishers responsibility. 

 

No religious or political belief is defended here. (Investigate yourself)

 

Individually you can be helped to find your Truth that is different of everyone. 

If you use discernment you are free to research with an open mind. 


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